I remember not to long ago feeling extremely stressed out. I kept taking deep breaths as if doing so was going to rid me of my worries and de-clutter the madness circulating in my brain. As I drove I remember thinking to myself:
“There is just so much to do, bills to pay, kids to register for school, tuition fees and medical treatments we cant afford, health complications, searching for a home to move into, cooking, eating, remembering to sleep and in between all that, remaining faithful to God in prayer and devotion.”
I remember taking another deep breath and wiping the tears from my eyes as I drove into work and my thoughts continued:
“Lord, what are you doing with all of this? I feel like we are juggling glass balls and at any moment one of those precious balls is going to drop and shatter. Will it be the health ball that falls first or the financial ball?”
How many times have we been in the same situation? Worried sick that things are not going the way we planned.
I know for me, life has been anything but easy this past decade, more so these past 4 years. Time and time again, suffering has become my companion and tears my food.
There have been days filled with immense pain, hardship and trials in the midst of days of sunshine.
But when days and seasons are draining my energy and destroying my hope; I pray for God to give me peace and I try my hardest to stand on the fact that my redeemer, your redeemer, He lives and He is with me and with you. I can’t see Him or feel him or touch him in a direct way, but I can see His beauty as I observe the wonders of His creation. Animals feeding their young and calling one another for companionship and help. Birds chanting a mid-day melody. I feel Him when I am embraced by a cool breeze on a hot summer day and when I hug my children I get a glimpse of His perfection and beauty.
So when worry fills up the hallways of my heart and I am consumed with doubt and fear I need to remember, we all need to remember that He lives and He has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of might and of a strong mind!2 Timothy 1:7
May you know that He lives, may we all know He lives and although the day may be at its darkest, the new morning is just around the corner.
Pray for me so I can remember these truths always. If you need prayer, please just post a request under the section entitled Prayer at the top right hand side of this site.
Lots of Love Mariana